Oktoberfest

So I've survived my first ever Oktoberfest festival in Munich. I can officially say, the rumours are all true, all you actually see is leiderhosen and beer (and what a mighty fine sight that is....)

In honour of not passing out at the table in the tent, here are my wise words of what I've learnt over the past 3 weeks.

1. If you don't get up at 7am to start queuing for a table at 8am, you will definitely not get a table
2. So I realised Germans use the excuse of the Wiesn as a work day. (It does however mean some serious team bonding going on)
3. Pretzels sold there will literally be 4 times the size of an average pretzel.
4. The fun fair ground is extortionately priced but you'll probably perceive it as pretty cheap when you've had a mass or two.
5. Unlike England, the bigger the head the better (I'm talking about the beer)
6. The only english/american songs you'll repeatedly hear the whole night are "Sweet Caroline", "Sweet Home Alabama" and surprising "Don't wake me up". Down with the kidz
7. The Bavarian waitresses work song is officially "Move Bitch, get out of the way" by Ludacris.
8. If you haven't done 3 laps around the Wiesn because you got lost from going on the rides, you're definitely not drunk enough
9. Germans do not take the dodgems ride light heartedly. You WILL regret bumping your car into them. This isn't a game for some.
10. Finally, watch out for the Italian weekend. I think they forget this isn't kindergarten anymore, it is NOT ok to start lifting girl's dirndls up while they're dancing on the table. 

Despite my oh so funny humour, it really is an experience and highly recommend any drunk British person to go. What kind of British person doesn't like a festival dedicated to alcohol anyway?